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A Man’s World Exposed – How To Tell If A Guy Likes You – Is He Really Interested?

in Does He Like You, Is He Interested
Guy Sitting Interest Like What Signs Signals

You’re going to read a lot about all the signals men give you and how you can use them to figure out if he likes you or not.

You’re going to be given body language cues which believe it or not, as a woman you already know what they mean. When it comes to reading body language you are already equipped with that skill AND you’re far better at it then most men will ever be.

You may also have been informed about his flirting techniques. Maybe something like IF he’s flirting with you – he likes you.

The truth is… Flirting is just a form of communication and never a fair assessment of like, love or interest.

Maybe you believe because he always looks so good when he sees you, or he’s always smiling, or even that “when he’s watching you talk to other guys” he MUST be interested.

Okay… really think hard about that last one and for it to be a fair assessment of like or interest you’d have to assume that what?  When you’re not around he never smiles, he looks like shit, and he never checks out a woman talking to some other guy.

Seems absurd now – doesn’t it?

Maybe because he always initiates the conversation. He’s always first to call or text you. How he goes out of his way to find you. Even the friendliest gesture can be reasoned and confused with any real gut level attraction.

Sure they can be good signs of his interest in you but then where does that leave you?

I’ll tell you – with even more questions like:

What are his intentions with you? How much does he like you? What is he looking for from you? What is he really interested in, a relationship, sexual fling, casual dating?

If you’re looking for a real definitive answer and that answer only makes you come up with more questions then sure you have the making of a great science experiment but not the REAL answer you were looking for in the first place.

Let’s not forget about when he starts to ignore you.

He is playing “man games” with you.

He’s here one minute and gone the next…

Then he must like you because no guy plays hard to get unless they want you to like them back, right?

Again all reasonable assumptions but what if he’s actually just been busy. What if he’s not playing hard to get, he’s just not into seeking approval or overly needy or like to take things slowly.

The answer of like and interest will once again be missed and send you down another path of over-thinking, wondering, guessing, and quite possibly turning you into a mess which will surely push a real man away.

Well – I’m going to assume you’ve heard it all before.

So it’s also safe for me to guess the answers you found – didn’t solve your problem.

You got lots of things to “look out for” but no definite answer based on your personal case and not some majority ruled generalization about men and the signals or signs that give you.

Why is that? Why, despite all those answers, you still find yourself wondering if he is interested in you or if he’s truly attracted to you.

If you haven’t gathered it by now – I’m a guy. Yep. Just another dude and I have all the parts to prove it.

Rather than give you the same old tips. The so-called science fact about our wonderfully unique mating process.

I want to share with you a guy’s world.

Many guys repeat your frustration EXACTLY,

“Does she like me? She’s flipping her hair. Exposing her wrist. She’s laughing at my lame jokes. She’s communicating 15 out of the 18 signals that she likes me so it must be true. Look!!! Even her feet are facing me. And I know I saw her lick her lips at least once – while we were eating dinner. Hmmmmm?”

Would you believe I’ve known lots of good-looking guys who I’ve caught several times talking to me about a “signal” some woman was giving and how it must mean she’s interested in him.

And these were guys who needed absolute no help in the dating world.

While all that’s going on you’re looking for the man version and at the same time (I might add) trying to use your female ways to show him you do like him.

This age old dance sometimes leads somewhere.

Sometimes you get that second date.

Sometimes you hook up later on.

Sometimes you accidentally lead a guy on only to find out you don’t like him.

And sometimes your “maybe relationship” becomes so confused and buried in the mystery of it all you lose sight of what it was all about in the first place.

Let’s not go there anymore.

Do you want to know (from a guy) exactly HOW to tell if a guy is interested in you or not?

A fail-proof answer which works EVERY time.

Do you want to know if a guy likes you or not?

Hope you’re ready for this SECRET no one has ever revealed to you before…

Here it is:

When his lips touches yours and he wants to do it again and again and again – he’s more than just interested. He absolutely likes you!

Man Kissing Woman

Did I just blow your mind or what?

Really, you must be thinking, that’s it? This is what you’ve building up to all along?

Yes because there’s something more important going on so read on if you dare.

You see – for you, me, men, women, EVERYONE – getting TO that point (kissing, touching, hugging, connecting, talking, screwing, whatever, etc…) is what it’s really all about.

Men don’t date women to become non-sexual friends.

They don’t get close to women without wanting to be intimate sooner or later.

They don’t feel attracted to you without wanting more than just a casual conversation.

The reality of dating is that the INSTANT you start looking for signals you’re taking yourself out of the most important place you’ll ever be…

The PRESENT!

And in the present is the only way to get TO that first kiss and to enjoy it too.

In one guy’s world – a man who knows what he’s doing and has real experience with women understands HOW to take you there. His signals mean absolutely nothing because if he’s wants you there and you’re so inclined to join him – he WILL lead you there.

In another guy’s world – if he doesn’t understand the steps. He’s too busy looking for your signals to give you any kind of clear sign himself.

In a way HE wants YOU to be lead.

His signals mean absolutely nothing because you’re not really dealing with his present, you’re looking at a guy who is either living in the past and trying not to screw it up with you OR you’re looking at his future as he’s trying to figure YOU out and what everything you do means as it relates to you liking or being interested in him.

Can you now see what craziness comes out of all the searching for sign or signals?

No matter HOW you look at it – you only open more questions, no real definitive answers, AND you take yourself far from a place where you can create attraction and build a connection.

For IT to be completely REAL for a guy – he needs some sort of physical connection with you. Anything from hand holding to an intimate hug to a kiss and beyond.

This means a guy will do everything and anything within his power (great or small, smart or dumb, direct or indirect, foolishly obvious or discreetly hidden) to secure or MAKE that intimate moment happen IF he likes you or is interested in you.

That’s HIS experience.

What you’re actually experiencing when you’re trying to figure out if a certain guy likes you is doubt about yourself.

Which has little or nothing to do with him or them. That’s YOUR experience.

Oddly enough – you know that.

Don’t you?

Hell I even knew it myself long ago even while I was sulking in the corners with a sad look in my face mumbling,

“Why doesn’t she like me?”

Took me a while to make myself actually believe,

“Well maybe she doesn’t like me because this is who I am. The type of guy who cries in the background and whines. I don’t even like myself!!”

That’s one of the extreme cases for men.

But in the smaller cases which I’ll assume is yours…

Maybe you don’t like one or two things about yourself and you try to hide those things from men.

Maybe you suffer from mild flashes of doubt which always seems to come at the “perfect” time.

Maybe you believe the guy you’re liking doesn’t seem to be into “your type”, or you’re too old, too young, too big, too small, too shy, too nice…

It’s absolutely perfectly reasonable to say you’re experiencing that doubt because you’re feeling attraction.

If you didn’t care about “how he sees you” or “if he’s interested” then you wouldn’t even bother asking that question.

Would you?

In the “all case” when you don’t feel attractive or likable at all you will actually try to stop yourself from “falling” for a guy because you know how deeply you’ll look inside yourself and how much it’s probably going to hurt.

What I’m saying, without getting too much into some blame game or who’s at fault, without telling you the same old stuff somebody else has already written is the ultimate answer to knowing if a man is interested in you:

In a guy’s world – the moment he feels attracted to you, he also experiences doubt.

Some greater than others.

Some handle it better than others.

Some hide behind a mask.

Some hide in the corner crippled by it all…

But the goal is always the same.

To secure an intimate moment which is dependent on the intimacy he needs and how he defines a physical connection.

Because that is when it becomes real for us.

I’m saying and I’m probably going to take a lot of flack for it but the ultimate truth if a guy likes you – starts with the very first kiss you share.

Getting to that point is best left to enjoy and experience (and not question) because you know it then becomes all about you.

Obviously we’ve avoided the social drama and the complexity of stepping from sight to relationship and how in our world there’s more to getting together than just feeling it for someone.

If everything a guy does seems to be leading up to that first kiss then you can keep assuming he feels attracted to you, he likes, AND he’s interested in you.

Stop looking for signals, body language clues or the deeper meaning behind it all.


Men don’t make sense.

All those frustrating things that men do that don’t make any sense to you as a woman will NEVER MAKE SENSE.

Stop trying to make sense of them for yourself.

Trying to make sense of a man in your own terms is entirely counterproductive and gets little or no results other than you becoming increasingly frustrated.

There’s a better way.

You can’t figure everything out.

Have you ever REALLY hit it off with a guy but after a few weeks or months, even though things seemed great, the man pulled away and starting acting distant and cold?

Most men, at one time or another, do things like this that are ridiculous and impossible to figure out.

So EXPECT to NOT UNDERSTAND everything a man does.

If you can become more comfortable with the idea of not knowing everything about WHY a man does what he does, then you’ll feel a strange sense of calm relaxation – along with an increase in your own self-confidence.

It’s frustrating and counter intuitive, but accepting what’s going on and moving forward from that reality in a positive way changes the whole frame of the situation.

But some women get stuck in the “I need to understand why he does this and THEN I’ll figure out what to do, think and feel” mindset.

This almost never leads to clear thinking and positive action.

Remember, men don’t make any sense.

So don’t depend on their actions making sense for you to develop your own opinions, judgments and next steps.

Pay attention to your gut, what you want in your life and what you know is right instead of rationalizing and finding a way for it to all fit together and be OK.

6 Ways On How To Use The Magic Of Intuition & Get To Know The Real Him

In conclusion… although be it a really long one.

You can go out searching for for signs or signals, body language cues, flirty communication, and all the different ways to figure out if a guy is interested in you or likes you but chances are you still won’t find the definitive answer.

If you want – you can even buy this for all that and more…

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  • 10 Crystal Clear Signs He’s Leading You On – and the 8 Reasons Guys Lead Women On – so you’ll never wonder why he’s giving you those mixed signals ever again…
  • 20 Body Language Signals men give when they’re interested in you – so you’ll know he’s not just “being nice” – and you’ll know when he’s starting to fall for you.
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It’s less than ten dollars, it comes highly recommended AND you’ll get all the signs and signals you’re looking for so you can begin to read men like a book.

BUT… before you whip out your credit card do NOT forget what was shared with you today.

Men are doing the same thing you are doing as proven by an article I wrote for guys who were asking this same question.

Here’s the answer that says it all:

“The more time you spend LOOKING for signals, the less time you get to create the attraction.

The more time you spend in your head, the less time you’ll have to get in her head, mind, and body, if that’s what you want.

Women are very in tune with what is going on around them and they will often follow the lead of the guy they’re talking to IF you’re good enough at it.

If you’re unsure, that makes her unsure.

If you’re not confident, that makes her less confident too.

When you find yourself searching for signs and signals and are unsure if she’s feeling it back – she too will be unsure HOW you feel about HER too.

So just by looking for the right “it’s okay to ask me out” you’re not leading, you’re waiting for her to decide and by doing so – make it less likely to happen.

It’s just basic human behavior which can not be helped so it’s best to first LEAD the interaction in the direction you want it to go.”

How To Tell If A Female Coworker Is Attracted To You

The same applies to you with a few tweaks:

The more time you spend LOOKING for signals or signs of his interest, the less time you get to build a connection.

The more time you spend in your head, the less time you’ll have to get in his head, mind, and heart.

If a guy is not leading you where he wants to go – he doesn’t know how and will probably lead you in the wrong direction anyways.

If you’re unsure, that makes him unsure.

If you’re not confident, that makes him feel less confident too.

When you find yourself searching for signs and signals and are unsure if he’s feeling it back – he will also be unsure about HOW you feel about HIM.

The leading part is the most different one because it’s usually not advisable to lead a guy.

Here’s what is recommended as just a start for you:

“Know yourself and what you’re after.

Find your personal standards and requirements… and then stick to them.

Know your needs and understand no man will just magically know what they are which means you need to communicate them to him in an appealing way, that also speaks to his needs.

Radically reject behavior that doesn’t meet your standards.

Do it in a way that rejects behavior and not him personally.”

How Dating Leads To Love & Happiness

So whereas he can lead you – you can also make sure he understands and knows what direction you’re willing to be led to.

My point is:

All this signal searching or trying to figure out if a guy likes you or is interested in you must be kept in check.

You can easily miss out on the present if you let it lead you too much.

Interest is one thing, attraction is another thing, liking or loving is also different, so you’d then find yourself searching for those answers as well.

So really…

The ONE clear sign that a guy is interested in you or likes you is…

When his lips touches yours and he wants to do it again and again and again!

Until that happens – why not enjoy the ride.

Thanks for stopping by and hopefully you found the right answer you were looking for today.

Go ahead and sign up below if you’re interested in learning lots of great stuff about men so you don’t have to go searching for answers – they can be sent to you directly. You can just sit back, relax, and take it all in.

About the author: Peter White… Showing men and women ways to attract each other naturally by helping you to understand each other. Over ten years experience which has shown me how to see things clearly and get to the root cause of most dating and relationships problems. Hope you learn and enjoy your why do guys experience.

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110 comments… add one
  • Helen

    Hi Peter,
    If a man is secure in the belief that a woman is attracted to him… Does he like the thought of someone being attracted to him? And will he eventually reciprocate her attraction in part intrigued by the fact that she is available? Assuming he doesn’t find her hideous to begin with?
    Thanks,
    Helen

    • Peter White

      Way too much logic going on here. 🙂

      Of course most normal “people” like to feel like others are attracted to them, regardless of it being a man or woman… BUT that doesn’t ever mean an eventual action or attraction by that person.

      Attraction to someone does not ever create attraction. In fact it’s more likely to decrease it.

      • Helen

        Hi Peter
        Maybe too much logic is being applied here again… But does that mean the odds of you attracting someone who is secure in your attraction in him or her is slim to none as long as they remain secure.
        Thanks
        Helen

        • Helen,

          Not at all. Just that it’s (mostly) easier to create attraction in someone who is not sure whether you’re attracted to them or not. Attraction is not a logical thing you can pinpoint exactly. It’s a primal feeling which is not chosen but happens for many reasons or “triggers”.

          I’m attracted to lots of women. If they know without a doubt of it AND they’re secure in themselves and/or have lots of guys attracted to them – THAT makes it harder for me to create (or more appropriately “trigger”) something that’s not initially there. BUT it’s possible. More than just possible or else I’d have no luck with women at all. 😀

          However with guys, it’s a bit different. We tend to feel attraction very quickly and it can turn to something else. If that attraction is not there something else can be built but it’s felt as something beside attraction.

          For some guys it does matter if he knows she already attracted to him (remember some guys just assume most women want them anyways) but at that point it becomes a choice rather than an instantaneous feeling. So the rules tend to change a little.

          See where logic gets you in these situations? A jumbled mess of confusion. 😉

          Attraction for guys just happens. They either feel it (or not) based on their own preferences, social life, and upbringing. Whether he knows a woman “wants” then in that instant feeling means absolutely nothing. It’s what happens after which yes, knowing she wants him might alter his choice for something else to happen or not.

          If a guy knows you’re attracted to him, it does not make you more less or more attractive.

          BUT if a guy feels like he’s losing your attraction or you don’t like him at all, it COULD alter his course or change his mind but that’s again, something entirely different than real pure attraction.

          Confused even more yet? 😀

  • Helen

    Hi Peter,
    Thanks for clearing that up. If I can shoot another question your way here? Other than the obvious course of finding another man is there any way to make a man wonder if he’s lost your attraction?
    Thanks
    Helen

    • Peter White

      Of course there is “Helen”. :p After you’ve flirted with him a little, talked with him a bit more, start ignoring him entirely and I’m sure he’ll wonder what he did wrong. I wouldn’t suggest you playing a game like that but ignoring someone AFTER chemistry happens makes that person ask way too many questions about what went wrong.

      • Helen

        Thank you for the help Superman,
        Helen ?

  • Donna

    How to get out of a intense desire for a guy. I’ve been talking to him for nearly two years. Whom I’ve never met as he keep restricting meeting up since he’s still hasn’t moved on from his ex of 10 years relationship.

    • Peter White

      I can only tell you what’s worked for me – for women though – replace your memories by making new ones. Keep yourself busy. Focus on yourself and meeting new people and exploring new things. Avoid all contact. Erase their number. Acceptance is only a few steps away as you let the feelings play out of you.

  • Laura

    Hi Pete!

    I am an 18 year old girl and he is a month and a half younger. We go to the same high school and have been becoming increasingly more close in the past 2 months.

    This guy loves to touch me. Every day for the past 2 months, he would come up to me before class and give me a long, tight, warm hug. It has become our daily thing I guess, haha. He also likes to reach out and hold my hands (not interlocking fingers, but touching palm to palm). He also hugs me from behind (not on the waist, but upper back) and puts his arm around me. When we touch, he doesn’t let go until I do.

    The other day, we were walking on campus together with his arm around me. A few moments later I said, “I’m cold!” And he rubbed my arm/shoulders slightly and replied, “Well, now you have me to warm you up!”

    Almost every day, he waits for me after class and walks with me to my next class. Whenever he sees me on campus, he will say my name excitedly with a smile and start a conversation. We have easy, nice and effortless conversations about whatever we feel like talking about. It’s playful, we have fun talking to each other and we tease each other a lot.

    I notice that in class, he likes to stare at me a few times per day. I always catch him staring at least twice, but he looks away immediately.

    Several of my friends and classmates are suspicious and have asked me if I’m dating him. So that means that the attraction isn’t in my head, right? I mean, even outsiders are noticing it!

    HOWEVER. He has not asked for my number, so that means we do not see each other or speak to each other outside of school. We don’t hang out outside of school. That makes me worried because I have a feeling that he should have at least attempted to maintain contact outside of school by now.

    How do you feel about the situation? What’s to be done?

    I would like to add one more detail that may be a red flag: A few weeks ago when he was hugging me from behind, one of my friends saw us and she said, “Oh my god you guys are so cute!” And he replied, “Nah, we’re not a couple. We’re good friends!”

    I took it as a sign that he was friend zoning me…I don’t know!

    • Peter White

      Hi,

      I’m not into ruining sexual tension or popping a bubble early on. I don’t advise men and women “talk” about things very early on when there’s friction. Mainly because it usually has the guy or girl destroy it.

      BUT…

      I’d say, if this has been building or happening for several months – it’s time for you both learn to communicate to each other what is happening.

      That’s your only answer here.

      Think of it from another angle which is not so positive – What are the odds (if and when) a relationship was to happen you two are going to be able to communicate to each other to form a solid stable couple.

      Having “nice and effortless” conversations isn’t really communicating however it CAN lead to better communication AND sometimes “nice and easy” can mean there’s no sexual tension. Hey, sometimes you got to “fight” a subject out or disagree.

      My point is: Find an “easy” way to bring up to HIM what you brought up to me. All this overthinking won’t get you anywhere. Months is too long to go “trying” to guess or figure a guy or situation out.

      I’m not going to tell you how because you’ll make it too complicate and over think and honestly, what’s the point when it’s not me who is in your situation and unfair for me to even suggest I have the one question to ask which will solve your problem. That’s beyond me.

      Just “communicate” to him – ask him – no games – no guessing – no “trying” to figure things out – MAKE something happen and you’ll have your answer.

      Best of luck,

      Pete

  • Vera

    Oh my god… the kiss thing is something entirely new to read. Lately i’ve been thinking about kissing this guy when we will be meeting next time. Not me kissing him, i had the feeling he will be doing it. The bad thing is we can barely find a good date where we both have time. A tad more complicated then that. But really this is so fun to read… because i really feel like he’s gonna do it. But i’m pretty relaxed about it. If it won’t happen on that day, it is okay- though some day it has to happen 😉

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