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Why Do Guys…?

Do Men Like To Know You Miss Them?

in What Men Like To Know
Do Men Like To Know You Miss Them? post image

Oh yes they do. 🙂

But… there’s always one of these isn’t there? You get a quick answer that seems all good on the outside and then we lay on the cold hard facts about men missing women.

I’ll put this one right out there – If a man does NOT feel attracted to you he won’t care if you miss him.

He’ll probably shrug it off, or downplay it because one of man’s greatest fear is turning on a woman he is not into. You know those guys who won’t leave you alone? Always trying to talk to you, the ones who creep you out the most, well us men feel the same way when we’ve “accidentally led a woman on.”

And now the WARNING:

It’s need to be genuine for a man to believe you actually do miss him. (I suppose for this to work. 😉 )

If you say it all the time it loses its impact.

If you don’t back it up by making an effort to see him, the never-ending miss cycle will push him away because he will not trust your sincerity. Men NEED to trust you more than you might have ever been led to believe before.

Probably because you’ve only heard women talk about how they don’t truth their man. Or they want a guy they can trust.

When a man opens up to you physically and even slightly emotionally they are trusting you with information and emotions which could effectively make him feel or be seen less than a man. If have you the power to emasculate him, tear down his ego, or “air out his dirty laundry” to the world his trust in you must be secure.

=>ALL men need to feel safe. Maybe not physically but definitely emotionally.

Part of the reason why I feel we like to know you miss us is because you’re assuring us that special trust.

Imagine a man saying or thinking this and you’ll see how important it is to a guy to hear how much you miss him…

“I have to let you go for a while. We’ll be apart for a time. You’re carrying my heart and soul with you. You know my secrets well. Please remind me from time to time you’re still carrying around my precious heart and no one will ever be allowed to take it from you.”

Next let’s consider the words, “Baby… I’ve missed you so much.” and what real effect it has on him.

The Mushy Stuff:

I want a woman in my life to miss me because it tells me she is thinking about me. I’m a part of her life. Not that she couldn’t function without me but the connection we’ve made enhances her happiness – and that also makes me happy.

The Sexual Piece:

Every man at some point in his life knows when a woman he is in a relationship with , (under certain circumstances) uses those words… it almost always is followed by a hug, a few kisses, maybe some more kisses, and then yes, incredible sex!

The Connection:

Men have a part inside them which needs to be fully connected to the woman he is in love with and to satisfy the sincerity of that connection, must experience an action related to it. That simply means you can tell him until you’re blue in the face how much you miss him but if you don’t back it up, he won’t “feel” the connection.

I committed to a girl once who lived several hours away. She struggled with revealing her feeling through words. But one day she had me spray a stuffed animal, I’m sorry drown that little doggy in my cologne so she could smell me anytime she wanted.

It was more than just a romantic gesture but an action which gave me no doubt she felt connected to me. And how much she missed me.

Now instead of leaving it there she took it one step further and bought a small comfy pillow which she sprayed her perfume on it. Knowing she wanted me to be able to smell her whenever I missed her increased the strength of our connection.

I could go a little deeper here, depending on your age group, the type of guy you’re dealing with, the obsessive compulsive aspects, the neediness and security issues, and so on… but let’s keep it as simple as possible.

*Men – who feel attracted to you, or have made a physical and emotional connection with you, or who are in a long-term relationship with you – like (and love) to hear how much he is missed.

It’s a sign of affection. A clear acknowledgement that there has been an intimate bond formed. An indication of your love.

A real support that no matter how far apart you find yourselves – you will always hold his secrets in with absolute trust.

And as always with men – showing him how much you miss is more effective than just saying it once in a while.

About the author: Honest, upfront, and an ability to see past the hidden layers is my intended style at why do guys. My goal is to un-complicate men and steer you away from the guys who will only hurt you. My hope is that you learn something, anything, and my writing style is at least a little easy to understand… Thank you, Peter White

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    91 comments… add one
    • Linda

      What does it mean, and I didn’t know what to say when my fiancé returned from an 8 month cruise on an aircraft carrier and told me “he missed me but not as much as he thought he would.” He had never said anything like that in his letters. I didn’t respond as, I didn’t know how to respond. I just wish I had some insight into it.

      • Peter White


        Chances are he didn’t mean that exactly. Sure there’s a possibility he was telling you that he’s thinking about ending your relationship but I doubt it.

        In his weird (manly) way, I believe he was trying to act strong. Granted he did it wrong but it was said and there’s nothing I can do about it. So, in this case – he might’ve been just trying to act all strong and courageous. He could’ve easily meant, “I missed you a lot but I did’t let it get to me. I was strong. I fought off the loneliness. I was brave and didn’t think about anyone else or anything like that.”

        You have to remember the mindset he puts himself being on a ship for that long. Men tend to shut off – go into a different mind frame to handle the “seclusion”. They (people) will tend to block things out to survive and by doing so – come back a little different and more importantly – come back with a little less ability to communicate. Just imagine the extreme and you were left on a deserted island by yourself for years and could not speak with anyone. Chances are, when you were found, your words and communication skills would have deprecated.

        Hopefully that’s all it was. Talk to him about. See if you can get that out of him and you’ll have your answer.

        Best of luck,

    • Diana Nicol

      I met a very good-looking man who was so courteous to me during a visit to Portobello, giving me his hand whenever I had to step up or down in the haphazard levels in the main road, which totally captivated me. So I fell in love with him. He came to live with me as a lodger and I was disappointed that he never came home till c. 2 a.m. Then he disappeared without a word. Worried, I contacted ‘Missing Persons’ police dept. They did not put us in touch, and said that he’d left a message for me. Not true. I looked through all the notes and papers he’d left behind and was shocked to find that he’d had HIV tests, so obviously was a homosexual. I did not tell him I knew this, and had a poignantly sad time. What could I say without making a fool of myself.
      His gallantry at Portobellow (sorry, spell correct, at least we get a laugh here) was surely meant to seduce. It worked. Reminded me of the recent TV film Rebecca, which ended with: “Rachel my torment.”
      That describes my situation perfectly. I must be an emotional masochist.

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