What Does a Guy Mean When He Says He Is Thinking About You?

Man Thinking Telling Mean Message Think You

The many reasons why a guy would tell you he's thinking about you are not always so obvious so let's make today the perfect time to clear up any confusion you might be having about why he would say it.

Never forget this...

As a guy, I would NEVER, ever, ever call up another guy (or woman) friend,  text him, or even dare mention to him,

"I was thinking about you and just decided to tell you."

With that said...

When he says he is thinking about you, it means he wants to see you again, among many other things of course.

Something reminded him of you in a good and often sexual way.

He's thinking if he tells you, you'll see it as a nice romantic gesture.

He's trying to tell and show you that he's interested in you.

HOW or In WHAT way he's interested in with you remains to be seen because a guy will say it just as easily if he's looking for sex, that night, or somewhere down the road.

In other words, three's not always a love or romantic reason behind the gesture.

If you're looking to figure out if he's just looking for sex, I wrote these posts for you:

When A Guy Says This… What Men Will Say To Have Sex With You

How To Figure Out Why Guys Might Only Be Looking For Sex From You

Okay, so...

Another reason a guy might tell you that he is thinking about you is because he's fishing for a response from you that reveals how you feel about him.

In this case you can safely predict he's attracted and interested in you.

Type two men are known for trying the fishing tactic.

You can learn all about the two types after signing in below or a little on the homepage.

Here are some examples to help you decide the full extent of what he really means.

When a guy wakes up thinking about you, he's feeling more than just attraction.

If you tells you, "I just woke up and was thinking about you." It is a very big sign he wants you to wake up with him anytime soon.

When a guy texts you that something he saw just reminded him of you and messages, "Just saw (... insert whatever...) and it made me think about you." - this is normally his way of connecting with you.

A guy will sometimes tell you he's thinking about you because he believes it will up your attraction to him.

It's a technique used to get you to think about him which, when done right can increase your feelings towards him and if you haven't guessed it by now,  also means he's feeling attracted to you.

Otherwise he wouldn't bother, right?

When a guy you're dating is out of town or far away and he tells you he's thinking about you, it's a good sign that he's trying to form a deeper connection with you.

He's thinking about you more because you're not around and therefore misses you.

He's feeling the need to tell you he wants to be assured you're waiting for him, he's on your mind, plus he wants to make sure you don't just forget about what you have together.

As stated here: Men LIKE to know they're missed!

When a guy lets you know just at bedtime that he is thinking about you, it's also a great sign he's looking for something more and wants you in his head at bedtime, which again - means sooner or later he wants you right there with him and by his side.

Here's the easier to read short list:

When a guy says he's just thinking about you it can be one or all of the following:

  • A romantic gesture towards you.
  • A genuine interest in wanting something more with you.
  • His way in forming a deeper connection.
  • An attempt (fishing) to see how you feel about him.
  • A technique to increase your attraction and/or interest in him.
  • A prelude to start a sexting session or a real sexual one.

It's ALWAYS done with purpose - It's ALWAYS a sign of some level of interest or attraction.

Guys will NEVER say things like this to their man friends unless of course they're gay, which adds the dynamic level of attraction to the meaning of the words anyways.

In very rare circumstances a guy might say it to a dear "woman" friend because they tend to treat their female friends differently than their male ones.

However, if you have any romantic connection with a guy - it's going to mean one of those listed above practically every time.

This means you are in his mind which may also mean you're in his heart too.

Heed my warning and keeping it real. 

A statement like this - whether it's verbal, texted, or messaged is obviously a very powerful and meaningful emotion to convey to a woman.

Some men know it.

Some don't.

To support myself and the reasoning behind how powerful it is and how good it is at detecting another one's feelings towards another, I've suggested a two text routine that contains these exact words:

SEND THIS: I was just thinking about you. 🙂

If you get no response within five minutes…

SEND THIS: HA! And now you have the pleasure of thinking about me. 😉

DO NOT send another text until you hear back from him.

Reveal How He Feels With Two Quick Text Messages

AND If it wasn't so powerful you would not have searched behind the meaning of it just for the sake of knowing it.

I believe you were looking for something supportive to tell you what you already felt like it meant, but you were not fully convinced because you got it from a guy who has been hot and cold - here and there - distant and close numerous times with you and this statement confused you.

And now you can see how easily it can drive up your interest and attraction to a guy - especially when he hasn't been too clear or upfront about how he feels with you in the past.

The warning is:

Some guys WILL use it to speed things up with you sexually If you're not there yet.

Which means you need to formulate a response which is consistent with your relationship with him so you're not led down a hurtful path.

Granted - the warning is only there because it happens and I felt you should be aware of it.

Understand it's VERY RARE and you can (mostly and safely) assume unless you're not sure hind is about who he is that the meaning behind it is GENUINE and REAL.

Now I get to ask you... based on all this:

HOW are you going to respond when a man tells you he was just thinking about you?

Do you know what to say back and how AND how long you should wait to do it?

Do you know what to say that will do achieve what you want - as in send him away, bring him closer, show him you care as much, or let it go for a while because you're not sure how you feel about him yet.

As I stated above - getting this from a guy means something IMPORTANT to him and unless you have no problems in this area - I wouldn't suggest you guess your way through your answer to him.

I'd love to give you a quick answer but I feel there are too many circumstances to consider and finding one solution or words you can use will fir them all.

There are many other variables to consider as in how well you know each other, your past history, are you his ex, how long you've been dating, how much you message or talk to each and so many more.

My suggestions however...  are EASY to follow:

The Why Do Guys free newsletter is a great place to start understanding men better.

Sign in below - read the ebook I wrote for that breaks men down into two types and you'll spend less time searching for answers and more time enjoying your life with a guy.

I had a great time writing it for you and I believe you'll find it informative and useful. In the very least a healthy and educational distraction from wondering anymore about why he told you he was thinking about you.

You should stay away from most "text his desire to you" products because they won't offer a real long-term results unless this is not a huge problem for you and you're just looking for some quick texts to send along to him.

The only one I've seen that comes close to today's problem post is called Text/CHEMISTRY by Amy North. You can check it out here:

Text Chemistry - Text Messages To Capture His Attention

With that said...

What you should seriously consider, based on the nature of today's post is really cool but intensive, so if you're not ready to put up the cash, just hop on Rori's newsletter and give her some of your time.

It's called Love Scripts For Dating.

When you want to know what to do and say in every situation you're experiencing with a guy, it's ALL included.

Especially how to respond attractively and in a way which brings him even closer to you, after he says he misses you.

You get "word-for-word scripts" that connect with a guy's heart.

Considering this case and this post - you must admit it's something EVERY woman must have by here side.

You Can Read All About It Right Here - Love Scripts For Dating.

When you're done, you'll...

Know exactly how to respond when a guy says he's thinking about you, exactly how long you should wait or not wait before you get back too him, and what to say that brings him closer and allows you to connect with him...

AND you'll also know exactly what to do when the next "what do I say or do" problem may come along... because they usually do!

Click Here For The EXACT Words He NEEDS To Hear To Want To Listen To You, Please You, And Make You His Forever

Have a Great Day and we'll talk again soon.

Thanks for stopping by.

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This article was posted in Is He Interested In You? Does He Like You? Signs & Signals Of Attraction, What Does He Mean – What He Says & What He Does Gets Explained Deeper

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114 comments… add one
  • Cindy

    “Guys will NEVER say things like this to their man friends unless of course they’re gay, which adds the dynamic level of attraction to the meaning of the words anyways.”

    Wow…what a way to perpetuate gender and sexuality stereotypes.

    • Don’t see how I’m perpetuating stereotypes of any sort, just stating facts. Straight men don’t tell their straight friends they’re thinking about them. It doesn’t happen.

      However, when a gay man tells another gay man (or even a heterosexual guy) that they’re “thinking about them” – there’s often a deeper meaning behind it which is covered above.

      I believe you jumped the gun. Your attempt to turn this informative post into something it’s not tells me you’re being overly defensive over something you feel passionate about. The passion I’m okay with. I understand how easy it is to take something out of context and snap back with your words.

      What I’m not okay with is your “assumption” and “accusation” of me being bias or prejudice as if you’re telling me I’m part of a problem.

      Which, if you actually knew me, took the time to ask a question before snapping off your words, sought information/facts first – would’ve seen how far off you are from being right.

      But… I DO appreciate you took the time to leave a comment. Thank you.

  • Ayce

    Hi, peter

    I’ve been in a long distance marriage for a few years now and when I seen your blog it got me thinking because me and my husband only knew each other 2 months before getting married and he would always say “I love you”, but I believe now it was only attraction. I know it’s crazy to be in a long distance marriage, but we usually see each other often until we will be able to stay together permanently. When I stay with him he doesn’t really give me as much attention to when I’m back in my country, which he will talk to me on the phone for hours (talk/text). He would also tell me “when are you coming back” or “I need you with me” What’s up with that? Why doesn’t he give the same affection to when I’m with him? Also, he always tells me He loves me even after getting married, but You got me wondering if it’s real because love is an action and I’m not sure he’s done something to show real love. But he does tell me he’s very attracted to me (after marriage). I believed he loves me because he treats me well, but that’s just the kind of person he is and what got me to love him and to marry him. Also I would like to add he doesn’t want kids anytime soon because he says “ I want to spend more time with you”, “I want to focus on you”, “I want to take care of you, before kids” or sometimes he would say he’s afraid I will forget him once I become a mother because my attention would be with our kids. What does he mean by this?

    Your blog got me thinking and wondering lol.
    I’d like to know your perspective on my thought and my questions.

    Thank you, ayce

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