Are you dating a guy who keeps saying he loves you but you're not sure if it's real or not?
Have you ever wondered if some man from your past truly loved you because it didn't work out - he said a lot and promised you everything - but never followed through with any of it?
If you ever wanted to know the TRUTH behind a man's love for you and how you can tell if it really is love or simply a passing lust that will soon disappear then you're in luck today - because I believe what you're about to read will reveal ANY man's TRUE feelings for you.
You're about to learn if what he or any man tells you is REAL of FAKE. By the time you're done you will have ALL you'll ever need to determine if LOVE is actually there... or not.
Let's begin, shall we?
The word love is a deeply treasured word in a man's world. It's often reserved for extreme emotional connections and is rarely spoken lightly or just thrown around.
A man will use the spoken word "love" so sparingly it's a safe bet or often a red flag that if a guy is using it too much - he doesn't meant it. Scary thought, isn't it?
This happens because men are about ACTION.
WHAT a man does and HOW he does it are much clearer and real ways to tell if he loves you or is IN love.
Words can be faked. Words can also be lies. Words can be used to manipulate you and make you believe something is real when it's not.
Also - from a man's point of view - to express his love using words means he must know WHAT to say and not every guy can do that successfully.
Going from heart to mind to mouth is not always a clear path a man can make successfully. Words are not a reliable representation of what a man is thinking.
He may not say how much he enjoys being with you but when he's willing to give up sleep just to spend time with you...
That's a TRUE sign of a possible love.
Rather than give you WORDS to help you figure out if a guy loves you or not I'm going to give you something more reliable.
It's a much more effective way to help you decode what a man is really saying and what it means to him - thus how it's connected to you and loving you.
Words without fear, action, conviction and commitment never represent a deeper feeling and are often used to validate or vocalize something else.
Using that template or whatever you want to call it, you have all the tools to figure out if he means it AND what he means when he's saying it to you.
If a man is telling you something which he has no fear over saying it or if it requires absolutely no courage at all - then how much can it really mean to him.
If a man is not backing up his words with REAL action then either something is holding him back OR they're just words and you should not trust it as a successful path he has taken from heart to mind to mouth.
If a man has no conviction (a firmly held belief or opinion) behind what he's saying to you then how much effort or resolve does it take for him to say it. The stronger the belief or opinion he has over saying it means he feels a deep emotional connection to it.
If the words he is using to describe his love or affection to you requires no commitment at all - then it makes saying it all too easy. You should realize those words... are just words.
Putting it all together...
If a man is using words without committing to them by doing something or taking real action AND there's no real risk involved in saying them AND they are not backed with conviction and/or some sort of resolve...
This means they are just WORDS and may not represent what he is feeling.
If a man says he wants to give you the world which you might assume means he loves you and in a guy's world it certainly could BUT...
If he has no real plan of action, if he's not connecting them to tomorrow or the future (commitment) and he has nothing to lose by saying it (fear or risk) AND if he's not connected it to something he's passionate about (conviction) then they are just merely words.
This does not mean he doesn't love you or think that he means it because remember above, the path from heart to mind to mouth is not always a simple thing for a guy to traverse BUT it may NOT represent the kind of love you want from him at that moment in time.
It's not what he says or the phrase he uses or even if he claims to love you...
It's the risk he takes to say them, the commitment to back them up with action, AND his conviction towards saying them that makes the difference between a guy who truly MEANS what he SAYS.
It may not always represent true undying love but you'll find one or two more carefully chosen sentences mean a lot more from him then from a guy who "never stops talking" about how much he is in love with you.
Love is a strange thing to figure out if it's real or not.
Putting it into words for most men is an ever stranger concept.
Some guys may rarely say it but their actions are that of a man who is deeply in love with you.
If one man is always saying it but DOING NOTHING to prove it, you know it feels fake and will forever question his conviction behind it. You'll always wonder if he really means what he says.
What complicates things further is what love means to a certain guy or what it feels like to him; and then getting THAT into words which actually make some sort of sense is even harder to fully decode.
Leading to the conclusion of my thoughts on how you can figure this all out once and for all.
Fear or risk - If it's too easy for him to say it, then how much can it really mean to him or to you? Sure some men avoid risk and have lots of fears BUT love is ALWAYS a risk and one that a real man must face because if he won't or can not with you - then how much can he really love you.
Action - Without backing them up through doing, they're merely concepts or ideas and sure they might mean something to him, but that doesn't guarantee what it means to you and your relationship with him at that point in time.
Conviction - Without passion, beliefs, strongly expressed opinions - words become merely a way to figure things out in his head. To you, without his conviction to his statements, you can rightly assume he hasn't truly figured out what he wants or even if he means it.
Commitment - A man can tell you he wants to meet up with you on a given day but if he doesn't show up, his words become something less than a commitment. It's narrow example but when it comes to him saying lots of stuff about the future and he never follows through with any of it or makes it a point to COMMIT TO HIS WORDS - then they certainly mean less than what he or you might have believed when they were first said.
Instead of thinking or over-thinking about what something a guy is saying to you means, consider what you've been shown today first and ask the right questions and you'll find by doing so - will explain a lot more of his love to you and if he really means it or not.
Asking these questions will help you figure out if his words of love to you are true:
- What risk is he taking to say it? What courage is required for him to say it?
- Is there a real conviction behind what he is saying? Is it tied to something he feels strongly about beside you?
- Is he backing it up with real action? The action doesn't have to be big or life changing, just something to prove to you that he actually wants it enough AND is working towards making it happen (with you) in the future.
- Is how he describes what he is feeling with you or want with you require a real commitment or does it feel like shallow promises of something he can never deliver or truly achieve?
Each and every one of those questions are not meant to be singled out.
They work together.
When one is clearly missing - it means something else or less than what you might be led to believe.
This does not mean he might not love you or that he might not believe or feel that way - it could just mean he's not ready, willing, or capable at that point in time and to you - that could be the difference between giving him the space or time he needs or to remove yourself from him so you're not stuck waiting for him forever.
Let's be real - you know as well as most others that WORDS are just WORDS.
What matters more are the feelings or emotions which creates those words.
Love is NOT always about what someone says or even what they think they mean to the individual saying them.
Love is a coming together of many things which always seem to include everything listed below:
When you love someone you'll find each one of those can and will come into play and without them - love becomes just another WORD without real meaning.
Now that you have a relatively easy way to determine if what he's saying is true or not - what about his actions or behavior towards you - are they proving his love or not?
This section was not written by me therefore can not be displayed at why do guys without the "almighty" Goggle slapping my wonderful site for simply trying to help you out.
BUT I found a clever way around their rules and linked them up someplace else and no worries because it's all run by me so it's cool.
Here's how it all works.
Think about today's post and use it to understand if his words having real meaning behind them.
NEXT - read the article below (because the highlights are not descriptive enough) and this will help you see if he's taking the right actions which prove love or not.
Sign of True Love #1: You’re connected to him.
Sign of True Love #2: It’s all about clarity.
True Love Sign #3: He actually cares about being TOGETHER.
True Love Sign #4: He’s not afraid to push your limit.
True Love Sign #5: He meets you halfway…or MORE than that.
True Love Sign #6: Your guy has “tunnel vision”.
True Love Sign #7: He’s always there for you.
True Love Sign #8: He’s part of your life – and not just the fun parts.
Lastly I've found this really cool and REVEALING grade-yourself QUIZ which was cleverly written by an affiliate of mine and showcased in a video he set up. It's definitely one of the best and accurate quizzes I've run across.
If you’ve ever found yourself laying up at night, chewing your lip and feeling incredible anxiety in your chest because you don’t know if a man truly *loves* you (or is just using you or waiting for something “better” to come along)…
Then you need to go watch this presentation and answer the 7 questions it asks right now…
7 secret “signs” men unconsciously give off that tell you if a guy is truly in love with you or not…
What’s crazy is that you’ll discover a man can be head-over-heels in love with you and never say the words…
OR he can say the words “I love you” but if he doesn’t pass the other 6 questions it means he’s LYING through his teeth (even if he doesn’t know it himself.)
The inevitable but oh so "lovely" conclusion...
I understand today's topic can be confusing - right - having to memorize his words and translate them back in your head and then compare them to what I wrote today can be tough.
BUT I also believe IF you're not sure if he means what he says this can and does work to prove his love or not.
So try it out and I'm positive you'll be pleasantly surprised how easy it actually is.
Here it is again and put as simply as I can so it's easy as it can be to do:
- Is what he's saying to you a little too easy from him to say?
- Is there any risk he's taking by saying them to you?
- What fears is he overcoming to say them to you?
Trust that for MOST men if saying he loves you is too easy at first - it's probably something else. It will get easier for him but early on - EXPECT it will be difficult for him to put it in words.
- Is he backing up his words with real action which shows real proof?
- Is he over-promising and under-delivering?
- Is he promising you things he can never give?
Real true love REQUIRES action of all sorts. Trust that if he's filled with promises and never follows through, he either doesn't mean it, he's not convinced it's real, OR being a man of non-action will ultimately determine whether he does something at all.
- Is he connected to what he's saying passionately?
- Is he what saying consistent with his deeply held beliefs?
- Are his words more than opinions?
- Does he have an emotional attachment to his words?
Strong belief systems are ingrained in everyone and are not always so easily manipulated, changed, or made malleable - the one thing that can override that system is TRUE LOVE. Trust if he's not connecting those beliefs and passions to you through his words - he probably doesn't mean it, doesn't know if it's there - or isn't fully convinced YOU could be the one woman who could change his beliefs.
- Do his words require a real commitment from him?
- Is he just offering a future without a real plan?
- Is what he tells you require devotion and dedication?
Sometimes men have lots of things they "say" they want to do which requires time and dedication which is great and most don't back it up. So if his words are not reinforced with a plan, don't require much from him to do, doesn't need devotion and a long-term dedication - he's probably just saying them because he thinks that is what you want to hear.
In other words - it's not proof of real love - it means something else or less. I'm pulling for you and hope he passes all these tests today.
All the best!
- 8 Actions Of A Man Who Loves You – How To Tell If It’s True Love or Fake - Article posted at Meet & Attract Him - Written by Slade Shaw.
- Slade Shaw is the writer and producer of Why Men Pull Away - Promotional Video and key member of Meet Your Sweet.
- 7 Ways To Know If A Man Truly Loves You video by Michael Fiore - creator and producer of Secret Surveys: What Men Desperately Want You To Know But Are Terrified To Tell You - Why Men Lie.