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Why Does He Keep Talking Dirty To Me When We Are Out Together?

in Dirty Talk and Such
Why Does He Keep Talking Dirty To Me When We Are Out Together? post image

You want to know what I am?

A little secret that, if it’s gets out, could clue in many potential dates as to my sneaky ways. I’d ask you to keep it to yourself but – yeah – this is going public anyways.

I learned over my many years how to tease you (not only better) but always a little more than you could possibly tease me.

In every possible way too. Yes. I admit. I do get beat once in while. Also been known to make a few enemies too. (Hey I have my reasons for pissing off a lady once in a while…)

I once teased a cashier after accusing her of looking up naked pictures of me on the internet. (Yeah I’m sure there’s a few of me out there somewhere. No peaking!!)

I (Ahem Ahem) managed my way into talking dirty with a woman who was “trying” to sell me an upgrade.

Sexually – well lets just say I make her wait for more. Then if I’m feeling it I’ll make her sweat it out until she either explodes or chases me down in frustration. Depending on the moment and situation of course.

You have to understand when it came to teasing, I believed it was a female thing. “No man dare to tease cause she can hold out longer.” And lots of guys out there still believe it.

Since so many men struggle with this I’ve taught them to turn a woman on when they know it’s impossible for something to happen. That way he learns HOW and WHAT it feels like to hold out. AND it makes her want him even more.

Call it sneaky if you will – but done right – you can’t say you don’t love it. At least from a man who you feel a little attraction for.

Now… as for the question brought to my attention, “Why Does He Keep Talking Dirty To Me When We Are Out Together?” my first thought is – He’s just being a tease.

But there’s more…

I suppose some men are hoping you’ll try something in public but is afraid of asking you. Maybe he doesn’t want to ruin the moment, or doesn’t feel comfortable enough with himself (or you yet) to ask you directly.

He may not understand he must ask about your “Do-able” fantasies or desires to reveal how far you may go.

While some men do it because they’re hoping you’ll get turned on enough to sleep with them later. Typically a “try-hard” kind of guy though. Or a guy who is always looking for a one-night-stand but rarely has any luck getting them.

He’s either playing the odds or is determined to make his intentions clear. He hates the friends zone.

There’s a another type of guy who’ll talk dirty to you while you’re out – he’s the classic watcher. Always checking you out. Making either comments about your body, like how much he loves it, or compliments you ONLY based on your more sensual parts.

He’s probably caught up in your looks so you’ll pay less (and sometimes more) attention to him.

Then there’s the sexually inexperienced man. Perhaps trying to inflate his skills in bed. You know the guy. He’s doing it because in a way it guarantees he won’t have to perform. They call it self-sabotage and yes, men will rather go without sex because they feel inadequate.

Lastly – it’s his thing. It’s what turns him on. Watching you get turned on in public or talking dirty is something he likes to do.

I’m sure somewhere up there is the type of guy you’re experiencing.

Again if it was me – my aim would be to tease. I can’t imagine me doing it to the point though where you’d want to ask someone else about it but that would depend on what it was saying to you, wouldn’t it? Or what I was teasing you about.

Yet – talking dirty is a man’s way to increase your desire while at the same time increasing his chances of having sex.

When it’s done right and both are satisfied, it can create lot of sexual fun and anticipation.

When it’s done wrong or attempted too much can become a needy attempt to see how you react. Some men want strong physical proof they’re getting some and others will do anything to find out if you’re “that” kind of girl.

Still doesn’t change the desired outcome though – increase your desire while at the same time increasing his chances of having sex. Whether he’s “really” into it is probably not as relevant.

I’d say, take a look at your situation and the answer will be there. Take at look at whether you’re enjoying it or not. Then understand your reaction to it – is it bad, good, or annoying?

From your answer I’m positive the man who is talking dirty to you – will show up in my little list above.

About the author: Peter White… Showing men and women ways to attract each other naturally by helping you to understand each other. Over ten years experience which has shown me how to see things clearly and get to the root cause of most dating and relationships problems. Hope you learn and enjoy your why do guys experience.

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8 comments… add one
  • Vicki

    Thanks for answering this question. I think he’s a watcher. We r both in commited relationships with others. And I find him watching and saying very naughty things to me when out as a group.

    • Peter White

      You’re welcome Vicki.

  • Nikki

    Hi there,

    Thanks for your post. I met a guy online, who complements me on my looks, but he only talks dirty and how he wants to have sex with me. I asked him if sex and hook-up is all that he is after, he refused and said he is looking for a relationship. And, he also explained how he never sent pictures of his penis to other women, but just me, for my enjoyment because he thought it would turn me on. Now, I am confused as to whether he is lying to get into my pants, or if I should give it a shot and meet with him. Could you advise as to how I should read his dirty talk to me?

    • Peter White

      Hi Nikki,

      Men who are looking for a relationship will generally “act” like they are looking for one… with you.

      If he’s only talking dirty with you – I highly doubt he wants anything more. And yes, I’d assume if he’s telling you what you want to hear, then he is only doing it to get in your pants.

      The truth is: The women I want more from, I do act like it.

      Your guy friend,


  • Lolabelle

    Guy who was extremely nervous in the beginning (a month ago) still a little nervous but has started talking this way. He’s very funny, so it is funny, but I don’t know if I should ask him to stop. Don’t think he means to be disrespectful. Admits to have been a nerd, growing up, and I wonder if he does this to compensate. I think he might fall into the “inadequate” category. I do like him a lot. Any advice would be helpful. Thank you.

    • Peter White


      Oh baby 😉 Okay – so I tried to come up with some dirty talk to tease you with but came up blank. Guess I have nothing to compensate for and feel quite secure… or just maybe I’m not as clever as I think I am. 😀

      Either way – it’s appears somewhat obvious WHY he’s doing it and since you’re still laughing and not telling him to stop he thinks he’s doing good. Like it’s working on you.

      Since you DO like him a lot maybe it is. :p

      The real questions are… Do you want it to stop? Is he offending you? If you believe he’s overcompensating for something or falling back on sex talk to see your response, is that really a problem?

      My point is – he’s obviously doing it because 1. He’s hoping you’ll join him and secure the idea that you DO like him. 2. Trying to be smooth and hiding the fact he doesn’t feel comfortable having normal conversations with women because that would expose that he feels boring. There’s probably a few more there.

      The only advice I can give you is to answer the questions I proposed to you above for yourself and if it’s not a problem (right now) then why bother bursting his bubble. Let him get it all out and maybe someday he’ll feel “good enough” to create attraction with words that are less than sexual nature.

      When and if it becomes a real problem for you and your relationship with or starts to makes you feel uncomfortable and exposed – Continue to change the subject until he gets the point. If he doesn’t be blunt – tell him how it’s making you feel and tell him he doesn’t need to talk this way to get you to like him more AND WATCH his response because you’ll see him for who he really is.

      All the best,


  • Jessalyn Chen

    My name is Jessalyn. I am a 24 year old college student. I am new to your website. I have a situation which is hard to explain. This guy from another country was messaging me online and asked me for a picture of myself. We never met in person though and he started asking me irrelevant questions, wanting to know where I am 24/7, if I am busy, and being nosy. I told him that I am not interested but he kept on insisting that we date. Thank you for taking the time out of your day to help.

    • Peter White

      Hello Jessalyn,

      My only suggestion is to block him on any and every site he can contact you. Why waste your time with someone like this. His attitude and actions will only get worse. Do the easy thing, block him and be done with it.

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