Don't you just HATE it when we've known each other for this long, and yet ever other word out of my "mouth" is asking you what you want, or how can I help YOU, or what's the problem you have with men that I can try to figure out for YOU?
I've been thinking about that and you know what...
Doesn't THAT sound like every "other" guy who just doesn't GET YOU?
Frustrating, isn't it?
He's always asking something which, IF he was really that into you that much and knew you like he says... He wouldn't have to ask, right?
Well, unfortunately most people just don't have the capacity or ability to understand the complexity of another person's mind or feelings.
They have ALL they can handle dealing with their own emotions or problems or troubles in life to successfully jump into someone else's mind and figure that out too.
It's all too true and terribly disheartening, isn't it?
Not the answer most want to hear or admit because it sucks, it (really really really really) bites the big one having to admit that within each and everyone of us, getting by with our own minds is hard enough, and adding another can be quite over-whelming.
Just ask ANYONE with one or more children and you'll quickly notice how "self" becomes second, because we're just not equipped in that way.
On that line of reasoning - it's only logical to assume and predict that anyone outside yourself, especially those you care the most for...
Are terribly confusing and figuring THEM OR HIM out too, seems like an impossible goal to ever actually achieve.
However... here's a little something which is comforting:
Men, as it relates to you, dating, relationships, or even the guy serving you coffee are NOT complicated at all.
They're really not - believe it or not if you will, fight it if you want, argue with me all you want, or even make a guesstimated assumption that I know what I'm talking about...
Because I'm a guy!
ALL I've ever wanted, and the hordes of men I've befriended over the years (minus the very very few who were just messed up) was to be understood, loved, respected, heard, and sometimes a little more.
It should, because it's a human thing which invariably means we're ALL very similar underneath our exterior; our wants, needs, and desires are more closer related than they are different.
Which also means...
Him (or all men in general) don't have to be a complicated calculus problem or some grand unified theory of our universe nicely bundled in one equation.
They're MEN darling.
You're a WOMAN.
However you go about your life to achieve being understood, loved, respected, heard, and useful or an impact (an affect) in the world... sure is slightly different in how you aim to achieve those things....
The goal is the same.
Once you ADMIT that and understand we may go in a million different directions to get there, it CAN become so simple to see when we look for THAT first in our quest to understand another PERSON, man or woman.
It may not be want you want to hear and it may not solve all your man problems but, it's the simple truth and often the simplest answer IS the most revealing.
When a guy is confusing you, when he's doing things which just don't make sense, when you make eye contact with a guy and wonder for a second WHAT is going on in his mind...
Here's what I want you to do:
Push your head a little higher.
Look at him Like YOU just know.
It could be anything you want or made up on the spot.
Maybe even something he doesn't know or has figured out yet.
But, you DO know he's looking for the same thing as you are, he's doesn't understand it all, he doesn't know how to get what he wants, it's ALL so complicated for him too.
He's so wrapped up the daily stumbling blocks faced everyday that his actions, ALL come from just trying to get by and feel better and live better and do it all so it means something.
This is not some modern new-age belief or a means to quiet your mind or even some way to prove to you that men are not complex or complicated at all...
Just merely MY way of showing you that whomever you meet, whomever you encounter, and all the people in between; well they're just doing the best to be:
- Respected and...
- Have a real impact in the world.
Isn't that what we ALL really want?
Don't you think if you had all that you could rest easily or enjoy life much more?
I think so!
But if you don't, then please - pass it along below in the comment section or where ever.
You WILL be heard.
You will make an impact on me, that's a guarantee because I have a little problem of taking on what other's feel a little too personal at times.
If MEN are confusing you, a lot of it comes from the undeniable fact that they are CONFUSED themselves.
Many men just haven't figured out how or why or in what way to communicate that to you in a way which satisfies their many basic human needs they strive for everyday.
If you don't believe me, take a close hard look at your life and I guarantee you WILL see it so clearly you'll cry your eyes out.
And when the tears stop....
You WILL feel better.
You WILL smile.
You'll probably laugh a little.
You'll most likely sigh loudly because it's tough. It really is! This stuff is hard. We know that or else we wouldn't even think twice about it.
And it's freaking tiring too.
That for sure but at least it makes for a good night sleep once in a while so we can wake up and feel refreshed, ready to take on the new day like it's the first day of the rest of our lives.
Okay... with all that said.
If men ARE confusing - I want the details.
I DO want to know what is confusing you so much because it helps me to understand you, to hear you, to respect you, not to love you in that weird way my wife would smack me for...
But to assure MY impact on YOU gives you every available opportunity to impact me.
We'll talk again in a couple days.
Your "hopefully not so confusing" guy friend.
Opening photo credit of confused man: Andrea Piacquadio
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