The most common question, okay I'll admit it - flat out demand I get from women who find out I show men what it takes to attract THEM was always, "What about us?!!"
"Why don't you show ME how to get just one good man?"
They say they only have two real choices with men:
The boring guy who does everything and anything BUT fails to create any chemistry.
There's a great chance a relationship with him would be stable. Not much fun but "drama" free. You'd never have to worry about him cheating on you. He'd do everything you ask. He'll never forget you birthday or anniversary. He'll just flat-out be there for you.
BUT he just doesn't do it for you.
The other guy.
He "does it" for you. Lots of chemistry and sparks and it's always a fun adventure WHEN you go out.
BUT a relationship with HIM.... HA!
Even in the slight chance he'd commit to you, you'll probably never feel like you have him anyways. He won't or doesn't open up much at all and when he does - it's only a glimpse followed by even more SILENCE.
You don't want to settle for bland boring one and the OTHER guy - he's driving you crazy as it feels like you're only chasing him in circles.
Again - it's like there's no in-the-middle kind of guy with of a little of EVERYTHING:
Reliable yet fun.
Humorous but knows when to be serious.
Willing to open up but is not some sniveling wuss always groveling at your feet.
Confident but not arrogant.
Smart enough to KNOW he's got a good thing going on with you AND tells you too.
So why is it I see so much settling out there?
You choose to eat "mildly" just in case.
The occasional indulgence is often followed by regret.
After that comes the "I'm okay with myself."
Then the doubt reappears so you get depressed and when you're depressed you get hungry... because at least "something" can satisfy your emotional need for fulfillment.
Admit it - you have and I bet you know lots of women who settle for "Mister Bland" or the "Mild No Spice Kind of Guy."
Maybe it's because at least you'll have some control over your life - well at least control over him.
You want to keep your treasured and unique feminine side but in this kind of relationship it's almost impossible.
YOU are in charge and you know it. He knows it. EVERYONE knows it.
With so called choice #1 you're allowing yourself to indulge in a masculine role.
You give it a try.
Seems pretty cool at first.
It's powerfully addictive.
You might not have ever experienced this at work or with your parents, and every bill you pay makes you realize what little power you have over life and they just keep coming.
But as I've found with every addictive experience there is the inevitable opposite reaction - regret. You may even feel bad for thinking so much about yourself first.
Then the "I'm okay with it - or myself - or this relationship works on some level - or now's it for the kids - or the worst ever, at least I'm not single."
This progression then leads to the "What if I was single" thoughts.
The sexual fantasies get worse.
They become all too real and then that nasty little pain-in-the-butt nagging feeling comes back - DOUBT.
Now you're depressed.
Maybe for a minute.
It doesn't last that long - a fleeting thought or two but you must admit over time, depression adds up until all too soon, like I've seen so many women go through, feeling bad about things is just something you learn to "deal" with everyday.
Maybe if you give yourself a sad movie to watch, or an hour of quiet alone time to cry, you'll get it out of your system.
At least that way you can get on with whatever until it happens again.
And all that really does is make you hungry - maybe not for a bacon cheeseburger but emotionally speaking you get hungry (again) for power.
Because at least you feel like you're in control of something!
If you're single or divorced, the power you usually indulge in is - dating, meeting, or going out with guys who you know have some serious flaw and the power of rejection is strong enough to send you emotionally spiking through every curve:
- Indulgence in power. ( Mostly masculine end. )
- The Self-Assurance Talk.
- Indulgence in power. ( Mostly feminine end. )
Let me regress back to the question above...
"Why don't you show us (women) how to get just one "good" man?"
You want to know the answer I usually give - you're not going to like it but here it is...
I DO but often times the advice spins around and cycles out because it's not used correctly because - and this is the part you don't want hear:
Women chase their tails.
I see the same pattern over and over again.
Consciously or not, they refuse to make a solid change which would take them off the beaten path they've made while running in circles.
Men who lack certain skills also chase their tails. They attract some women but usually get stuck on one. They run the same "gauntlet" women do. They literally experience femininity as it relates to these kind of things.
Men who lack "attraction" skills smash head first into sliding glass doors - again, again, again, and "ouch!" -again.
The truth is while they lay out half cold and stunned us "gurus" plant the right seeds, show or tell him to get up, and send him rolling along.
He typically lasts for a short time before he hits another glass door landing on the patio again.
But we do pick him up until sooner or later the glass disappears or becomes obvious to him - so he knows it's there, opens it or walks away, thus avoiding the smashing pain.
I hear you,
"Women chase their tails!!! What are we some kind of stupid dogs too stupid to realize we're running in circles?"
Well obviously not, but the analogy DOES work.
No matter what you're doing - if it's not working for you the way you want it - and it keeps sending you round and round through the same emotional cycle - and you're far from getting the ultimate man mix ( which is the wonderful blend of number 1 and 2 above) then you must admit you're on, in the very least, some kind of Merry-Go-Round.
You're stuck on a ride which goes up and down and round and round but really never goes anywhere.
If you feel like you're still in the same place you've always been and you're stuck with only two choices of men - then isn't about time you found YOUR proverbial sliding glass door?
Isn't it time you stunned yourself just enough to get you to wander off the sunken path you've made for yourself?
Isn't it about time you allow yourself to experience something new and exciting - without the feeling of regret and doubt you always get after?
I'm not talking about empowerment.
I'm not asking you to feel more powerful because you're going after something you really want.
Won't that just send you back to where you started from destined for another ride?
Do you want to know the most common advice that, without proper knowledge represents your not-so-free ticket on that Merry-Go-Round AND it's everywhere?
- You need to love yourself.
- You need to be confident.
- You need to enjoy life.
Sure - that stuff works.
It's a part of living.
That's the kind of power you can seek all you want without fear or regrets.
But if you don't understand HOW men work - or how to get him to work harder for you - you'll only once again find yourself with those same two choices of men.
Sending you round and round and round...
I'm asking you right now, this very minute, to take one step to the left (or right) and just for a little while - focus on what it really takes to "melt a man's heart."
Any man you want!
Michael Fiore has set up a "sliding glass door" presentation for you to bump into. (By the way Michael was man #2.) which you can watch right now by going here.
Within the first ten minutes you'll learn the most powerful truths about how to make a man love you in three simple steps.
These three steps are not just casually given but are backed up with a myriad of ways you can get them to work for you. They will not have you chasing your tail.
You'll quickly understand why you don't have to settle for #1 - Mister Boring, or get stuck chasing #2 - the "I don't commit EVER guy."
Take the next twenty minutes of your life and just stop, listen, and explore the "truths" about men and all you'll ever need to to make him want to give up everything for you.
"Why don't I just show you how to get just one "good" man?"
Because I would be limiting you to one guy you might not be satisfied with anyways.
Learn how to attract any man you want - Learn what he needs - Learn what you can do to make them fall madly in love with you - and then you can truly use all those personal power techniques to decide your own relationship fate.
Capture His Heart is about getting off the Merry-Go-Round and finally realizing how easy it is to finally get the man of your dreams.
He’s out there.
He’s looking for you.
And by using these simple tools you’ll make it so easy for him to find you and to finally give you the relationship you deserve.
Claire Casey is the Author of Capture His Heart. I've posted up some advice columns from her below:
- You Say Flawed, He Says Sexy, What Men Really Think About Your Body
- 2 Things Men Are Terrified Of, How You Can Help Him & Make Him Love You
- Does Your Man Watch Porn? Should You Worry? Is It Good For The Relationship
- Do You Think He's Cheating When He Really Isn't? How To Define Infidelity
- Is He Moving Too Slowly For You? Is He Taking Forever To Commit To You?