Written by Hannah Jackson, creator of Make Him Love You Forever, The Deep Attachment Sequence That Captivates His Heart.
“When you fall in love, the natural thing to do is give yourself to it. That's what I think. It's just a form of sincerity.” ― Haruki Murakami
If you’ve known a guy for some time now, and you’ve got the hots for him, you probably want to know if he feels the same way.
More than that, you want to know if he’s falling head over heels in love with you.
Many women find themselves in a “he loves me, he loves me not” type of situation where things are ambiguous.
And if you’re reading this, chances are you want some clarity on your situation, too.
Uncertainty is a scary thing, especially when it’s your heart on the line. You might have gotten burned before, and you want to make sure what you’re getting into before you go “all in.”
So I get a lot of friends and clients asking,
“How do I know for sure that he’s falling in love with me?”
To get to the bottom of this matter, I decided to get the inside track and pick the brains of guys who are in happy, committed relationships.
I went straight to the source so I could get the honest, unfiltered truth about what goes on in a guy’s head when he’s seeing stars and feeling those fireworks with you.
Take Nate, a classical guitarist from Arizona, for instance.
He's been married for 25 years now, and he was more than happy to share how he felt when he first met his wife, Suzanne (names have been changed for privacy reasons).
Here’s what he said:
“Before I became a musician, I served in the military. I won’t go too much into it, but I saw some action… and that left me scarred.
The first two years after I came home, I struggled with how I looked and the fact that I wasn’t the same person anymore, physically and mentally. I tried getting back into music, which was about the time I met Suzanne.
It wasn’t at all like ‘Love at First Sight’… I just saw her as an acquaintance. I was probably too caught up in my own stuff to notice her, anyway.
But then something inside me clicked. As I got to know her better, I found that we had a lot in common, especially when it came to music.
Then I started noticing other stuff about her, like how she runs her fingers through her hair, and how her eyebrows arched. It sounds silly I guess but I sort of just appreciate those small things.
Oh, and her laugh! I swear it’s the most amazing thing I’ve heard in my life… it’s like her laughter could solve world peace or something.
And then suddenly I couldn’t get her out of my head. I just liked everything about her, from the way she smelled, to how she spoke and a million little things that made her perfect.
It was like looking at a painting at an art gallery. At some point the colors just popped out and the details came alive.”
And that, ladies, is a man in love.
I see the same thing in older folks, too. Nate’s story reminded me of my friend’s grandparents. It’s very subtle, but it’s the most amazing thing ever.
When they’re together, I can see his grandpa’s eyes light up. I could tell how differently he saw her from other people - it was all over his face.
But now you’re probably thinking,
“Ok, that’s nice and all, but what about the SIGNS?”
As I said, I talked to a lot of other men so they could weigh in as well.
After calling, emailing and Skyping almost a thousand guys, I noticed that a lot of them echoed the same thoughts.
So, here are six of the most common responses I got across the board. I’ve picked out the best replies to give you some valuable insights on falling in love from a guy’s perspective:
#1: He Wants to Be Your Superman.
Scott, 47, who’s been married for 20 years, says:
“I realized I was in love when I wanted to be the absolute best version of myself. Not just today, or tomorrow, but for years and years to come.
Ever since I met my wife, I knew I wanted to be that guy as long as I'm alive. I guess that seems over the top, but that's really how I feel."
When a man feels that powerful connection with you, there’s something inside that pushes him to do things he never thought he’d do.
And now, he’s busting his tail to do everything he can to make you fall in love with him even more.
You can see how much he lives and breathes for your affection and approval, and you’ll see the kind of EFFORT he puts in.
"Before my wife, I was just another lazy, unmotivated slacker. But then she saw something in me, and I knew I'd be an idiot to let her go. I got off my butt and decided she was the reason to get my act together.
It felt like all those B.S. excuses in my head suddenly crumbled into dust. I had to be a better guy so I could feel like I deserved her.
I was in college, and I stopped hanging out with my stoner friends.
For the first time in my life, I took something seriously. I was on the verge of dropping out, so my folks were surprised when my grades shot way up!”
I’m not saying women don’t feel inspired as well when they meet the right guy, but it’s different with men.
A guy’s brain is wired to please his woman, and when he meets The One, that part of his mind just lights up.
His protector and provider instincts kick in, and he’ll be damned if he can’t prove his worth to her.
#2: He’s Learning From You.
Calvin, 38, has been through three relationships. He's now engaged to his fiancé, and he said this to say about her:
“In the past relationships I’ve had, I learned other important stuff, like controlling my emotions, keeping my jealousy in check, being a patient boyfriend, and basically how to act like a mature adult.
This was important stuff I had to learn before I could be ready to meet the girl I was going to marry.
So during those times, yes, I was in love because they taught me how to be a decent human being. So I’ll be forever grateful for them.”
He went on:
“When I fell in love with Allie, I also learned a lot of valuable lessons about myself and about love.'
When I was with her, I realized that I also had to love myself, which was the biggest breakthrough in my life.
I grew up in a family that basically trained me to beat myself up emotionally if I did something wrong. And I kind of hated the world because of that.
But with Allie, I got a wake-up call. I finally learned how to lose that chip on my shoulder.
I knew she was different because she helped me understand who I really was. That helped me make that change that was long overdue.”
A lot of guys have beautiful qualities that are buried deep within them. You can't really see it at first, but it's there.
When he meets the right woman, that hidden part of him will suddenly blossom. It will catch a lot of people off-guard – including himself.
So if your man is learning and growing because you’re together, that’s a good sign he’s falling hard for you.
#3: He Wants To Experience It All With You.
Al, a 55-year-old husband and father of four, shares his thoughts:
“When we were in our early twenties, I already knew my wife was the last girl I’d fall in love with. Being young and all, I wrote her a sappy love letter, and to this day I still feel exactly the same.”
This is what Al wrote:
“I want you to be crazy about me as much as I’m crazy about you. I want to be the man who loves and supports you like no one else can. I want to make you feel safe, happy and cared for every minute of the day.
Most of all I want to kiss you wherever we are. I want to kiss you on top of the Grand Canyon, or at a beautiful beach in Hawaii while we’re under the stars.
I want to make love to you and feel you against me, I want to lose myself in you. I want to be part of your life and I want to experience it all with you.
I want your family and friends to know me and be part of their lives too. I want them to see how much I want to be your man, the one who’ll stay with you now and forever.
Above all, I want to feel like this until we’re old and gray.”
Al went on, "I wasn't a poet or anything but those words just came out as easily as breathing…"
“Looking back, I could have written it better but I think it did the trick,” he said with a laugh.
I’ve helped a lot of my clients with their love lives, and this is one sign that tells me they’ve got a solid relationship.
A guy who has serious feelings for you wants to feel connected to you in the most profound way possible.
And that often means he’ll make room in his life so he can be part of yours.
He’ll want to create amazing experiences with you, and make memories that both of you will carry for a long time.
#4: He Feels Accepted By You.
Aaron, 52, has been married twice. He told me what he was thinking when he fell in love with his second wife, Bridgette:
“Looking back at my last marriage, one of the reasons it didn’t work out was that I felt judged all the time. I tried opening myself up and being honest about my feelings, but it always seemed like I was ‘punished’ for doing that.
Same goes for my shortcomings, too. I mean, I know I’m not perfect of course, but I felt more and more that my ex-wife didn’t accept me for who I was as a person who had all these flaws.”
This was pretty much the opposite case for his relationship now, which he also talked a bit about:
“I can really see the difference now in my current marriage. With Bridgette, I can actually be open and straight up with her, and she doesn’t flinch or freak out.
She knows exactly who I am and vice-versa.
Those walls I used to have aren’t there anymore. And I know that even if get real with her, and she sees who I truly am, she accepts all of it.
Not that it makes it ok for me to act like a jerk around her, it’s not like that.
What I mean is that she understands where I’m coming from as a man, and as the other half of the relationship …and she doesn’t judge me for that.”
Listen up, because this is something men will never tell you...
Guys constantly feel pressured about having to live up to an ideal model of masculinity.
They’re worried that if they fall short of this expectation, they’ll be judged and get labeled as a “wuss.” Like women, a part of them just wants to be loved for who they are.
And they want to feel loved even when they’re not at their best, or if they’re not living up to the typical idea of manhood.
Also, a lot of men think that showing their emotions is a sign of weakness.
So when a guy opens up to his partner, a.k.a. The One Person he can be vulnerable with, that's a big deal to him.
Men don’t just want to be seen for what they’re useful for, or what they can provide you with.
They also want to be seen as a complex individual with a lot of layers.
And if you make an effort to really get to know him and see the other parts of him, he'll feel accepted.
Let me tell you, that’s the best feeling a guy could ever have.
#5: He’s There For the Grimy Parts, Too.
Kyle, 33, met his wife Karen at an online dating site. She had a two-year-old son from a previous relationship, and he didn't have a problem with that.
Here’s what he said:
"Honestly, I didn't know what I was getting into, but Karen had this vibe that closely matched mine.
We liked the same things, such as watching horror and indie movies and listening to the same music.
I just felt energized around her, and her son is the most amazing kid I've ever met.
And I'm not just saying that because of his mom (laughs).
Anyway, we'd been going out for like six months or so, and I knew she was the one because she had this kind of warmth that made me feel loved and incredibly strong at the same time.
Does that make sense? That's the best way I can describe it, I think."
So Kyle seemed like a really swell guy, but I didn’t know the whole story yet.
It turns out he was giving himself way less credit than he deserved.
Karen was right by him while we were talking, so she couldn’t help but jump in:
"Ok, so there was this one time when we were partying with some of my friends.
There was plenty of food and drinks to go around, and I had more than I could handle. An hour into it, I started feeling real sick, real fast, so Kyle took me home.
I charged through the front door and went straight to the toilet to throw up. Kyle basically spent the whole night me as I went back and forth from my bed to the bathroom.
It was nothing serious thankfully; it was just a bad reaction to the food on top of having too much to drink.
But he was there the whole time helping me hurl into the toilet and cleaning up after me.
And in the morning, he made me coffee and pancakes. And we were barely dating for a couple of weeks when this happened!"
Then she had a couple more stories to share:
“On our first date, he brought over a Thomas The Tank Engine plush toy for my son because he asked me what he liked.
And there was one time I got slammed at work and had to work late, and the babysitter flaked out on me at the last moment.
Kyle stepped up on such short notice without a second thought. I came home to them sleeping on the couch together with my son's favorite storybook.
He barely knew my son back then, and he cared for him like his own. That rocked me to the core, it really did (wipes tears from her eyes)…
When my son's father dropped us like hot potatoes, I thought no one would ever want me.”
They've been married for four years now, and they've got a baby on their way.
Suffice to say, a guy who sticks around when he could very well bail is someone who's got it bad for you.
I’m not saying that a guy needs to have a high tolerance for bodily fluids or needs to love kids, but a man who isn’t just around for the fun stuff is someone who’s fallen hard for you.
#6: He Sees ALL of You.
When a guy is in love, he’s super focused on you and notices all the little details that others don’t.
As what Nate said, he finds the most minuscule aspect of Suzanne enchanting. You could say he's biased about it, but that's a good thing.
A man who’s falling in love has this special filter just for you, and you can almost pinpoint the exact moment when it comes on.
And it’s not just the physical features, either.
He’s attuned to who you are and what’s going on in your life. He can readily identify the things that tick you off, what scares you, and the things you aspire for.
He knows the people in your world that annoy you, inspire you, or stress you out. He pays attention to these minute details because they’re just as important to him as they are to you.
Suzanne shared this about Nate:
“You know what? As much as we’re crazy about each other, Nate really sees me for who I am… even the not-so-great-parts. He knows what I’m capable of … and he actually has the balls to call me out when I’m not being the best I can be (laughs).
I need someone like that to ground me, but also make me feel seen and appreciated at the same time. That’s my Nate.”
So He’s In Love With You – What’s Next?
Now that you’ve gotten to know the most honest signs of a man’s love for you, it’s time to take action.
If you’re seeing these signs in your guy, consider yourself the luckiest gal.
Any woman who’s been on the dating and relationship circuit for some time will tell you how hard it is to find a man who’s got it together.
So you need to make sure that spark you have between you now will keep burning bright for decades to come.
On the other hand, if you’re not seeing enough of these signs in your guy…
… and you’re worried that you’re doing something wrong…
Don’t lose hope!
Regardless of where you stand with a guy, there’s plenty you can do to make him love you like crazy, over and over.
It starts with a subtle but psychologically potent approach to make him DEEPLY ATTACHED to you.
Check out this out now to learn more:
Shocking Confessions Of 416 Men & Things They Crave
If you’ve ever wanted to know the REAL reasons:
⮚ Why men lose interest and switch off their love…
⮚ What turns him off…
⮚ What makes a man desire a woman so intensely he can’t stop thinking about her…
⮚ What he NEEDS in order to take the relationship to the next level…
⮚ And most importantly, what makes a man SURE that he has met ‘The One’…
…Then you MUST check out this page right now:
Relationship coach Hannah Jackson, sent out an intimate relationship survey to men…
She was shocked when over 400 men responded with their raw, brutal and honest confessions.
These confessions lead her to discover the ‘Deep Attachment Sequence’.
Use this 5 step sequence to set off a biological attraction inside him, that makes him naturally want to devote himself to you.
You need to hear it for yourself.
Read more from Hannah Jackson at Why Do Guys: