Pole dancing or pole exercising certainly raises some interesting and often heated discussions between men and women. The most recent discussion I found myself in with my girlfriend involved the sexuality of the sport and whether we (us guys) find it erotic or sexually exciting.
But first, here are the recent events in Pole Sports:
On October 2, the GAISF (Global Association of International Sports Federations) gained Observer Status to use and develop their sports which could help make Pole Dancing or more appropriately Pole Sports an Olympic Sport. The IPSF (International Pole Sports Foundation) want to set,
“…in place format that will be accepted by international sport governing bodies, the IPSF’s goal is for the Olympic committee to recognise Pole Sports as an official sport and to become part of the Olympic Games.” – http://www.polesports.org/
My girlfriend is very passionate about pole sports and practices it often. She had recently decided to develop a routine for me as a wonderful and thoughtful birthday gift. A gift you might believe lots of men might enjoy but as I figured out what she was doing, the topic of how sexy I think pole dancing is came up.
She was surprised when I told her that “pole dancing” is not really sexual exciting to me. Sure, her enthusiasm and passion doing what she loves is always exciting for me and I support her in any endeavor, but the truth is I don’t find it that sexually appealing.
I fully understand the difference between a stripper swinging on a pole half-naked and the full athleticism it takes to perform pole sports. I understand what a stripper does is much easier (athletically speaking) and just maybe that’s why I don’t see pole sports as a sexual thing.
I thought about it and wasn’t sure if I was alone in my thoughts.
Was I the only man who felt this way?
Do lots of men find pole sports not as sexually exciting as a woman dancing around a pole while stripping?
Is it when you add athlete or sport to something does it become less sexual and something else?
Our discussion went on and something entered my mind:
I don’t believe I find pole dancing sexual but I do find it fun to watch as a sport. The same as I would watching any sport. This was my initial thought process.
However, when she began showing me a video of a guy doing some amazing moves on a pole I felt a little disgusted. Sure, he was impressive. The moves were very advanced and difficult and he must’ve taken the time and effort to get it right but then why was I taken back from it?
It did not have the same effect on me as watching a guy doing the rings or any gymnastic sport during the Olympics? Why?
There must be something else going on which has something to do with the pole dancing done by strippers. Since I don’t find men attractive, or I’m not gay, the sight of seeing a guy perform wasn’t as pleasurable as watching a woman do the very same moves.
Therefore there is some sexual attachment to pole sports my mind is not seeing but the man inside me is recognizing as sexually attractive.
It only stands to reason that this goes deep and as a guy it’s certainly a struggle to come to grips as to what all this means.
I certainly find my girlfriend highly attractive, sexy, beautiful, and she has an amazing body. She turns me on in so many ways and despite her beauty, it’s not always her looks. I’m not the type of guy to enjoy paying a woman I don’t know to tease me in a strip club but obviously if my girlfriend wants to strip for me personally, she WILL turn me on and I will encourage her to do whatever she is comfortable doing while we are alone.
Maybe it’s the athleticism of pole sports which stops me from enjoying the sexuality of it or how sexy it can be.
Maybe it’s the muscle thing, as in when I’m watching a guy and see more muscles, I don’t feel excited because I’m not attracted to muscles on a woman and I know the type of strength it takes to perform in some seemingly simple pole moves.
Although I will admit I’ve seen a few woman “pole-rs” who were not that muscular, they were in good shape but it didn’t make much of a difference for me sexually.
Maybe it’s because I have not watched enough pole dancing to fully assess my sexual excitement for the sport and I do plan on watching it more frequently for “research” reasons of course. In other words, when my girlfriend is on a pole I will be sure to not only encourage her but to have a front row seat.
Until now I haven’t really thought about it.
I‘m not entirely sure but I will guess if you ask a man which is more sexually exciting, going to a pole dancing event or a strip club, he will have to admit watching a stripper is certainly more exciting but that’s probably because she will be taking her clothes off.
My intention is not to compare the two but merely point out the reality that up until recently, a pole and a woman typically meant she was stripping. We never considered that history dates back pole dancing to men and not women and goes back at least eight hundred years:
In my short life, as with most modern men, the introduction of the pole was strictly in a “gentlemen’s club” because Pole Art and Pole Exercising wasn’t introduced until much later in my life:
“The pole dance craze is believed to have kicked off in Canada in the 1980’s. A woman named Fawnia Dietrich initiated the first ever class in teaching pole to non-performers in 1994, and has gone on to create the world’s first pole dancing school and produced various instructional videos.” – The History of Pole
In my mind – pole “dancing” can be an exercise routine, it IS an art form, it IS a sport and deserves to be in the Olympics. It’s amazing what we can train our bodies to do and this sport rises above many others in body training and so rightfully deserves its place.
“Learn To Pole Dance Easily From Home! Go From Beginner To Expert With Over 100 Step-By-Step Videos With Private Coaching That Beats All Other Pole Dancing Classes!” – Pole Dancing Course
However, the act of stripping around a pole, or watching my girlfriend put on a private “show” just for me is most definitely more erotic to me.
It’s tough to say what exactly turns us on considering many different men and what they exactly find sexually appealing. I’m sure there are lots of guys who DO get turned on watching a woman perform on a pole as opposed to me who sees it more as a sport than a “turn on”.
Now that the pole has evolved or gone back to its roots I’d say it’s a good thing it’s moving away from an erotic dance where the performer is not really doing much more than dancing around a phallic symbol to something which highlights our amazing human physical abilities.