Why is it when a guy is into you, shows every sign he likes you, but the next time he sees you, it's like you don't even exist?
He acts a little distant and barely listens to a word you say.
You want to ask him what's wrong but you're only somewhat dating or anything more.
You're definitely not in a relationship.
You're still getting to know each other...
But for some reason he's making you feel you did something wrong and this passive aggressive attitude he's displaying is making you wonder why you're even bothering with him at all.
I was totally into this "chic" once. She was the type who lots of guys chase. You could take one look at her and instantly assume she could have any guy she wanted.
If you don't know about how much attraction controls men I can tell you it's not too easy to shrug it off. It makes you do things you wouldn't normally do.
It makes you almost want to give everything you got, all in the hopes her attraction would be returned.
The way I see it, as a man who has studied this stuff extensively, us guys actually "suffer" from attraction (it literally hijacks our brains) because if we follow it blindly seems to do just the opposite to the woman we're madly falling for... makes her feel less for us.
Well let me tell you this girl had me hooked. Literally every curve on her body mesmerized me. Her face was flawless and her eyes, the way they lit up when she saw me... got me scared.
I was terrified that I was going to screw it up.
So here's this guy, me, definitely NOT the greatest "ladies man" in the world at the time, hasn't had much success with women, and feeling it like there's no tomorrow...
While experiencing the peak of my attraction I gave it my all despite all the fears...
Tried to make her laugh.
Tried to find a connection with her.
Tried to be "all that a man could be" because I was "suffering" from a lowered self-esteem just being around her.
Just so you know, it felt like it worked. She was returning the flirts and playing right back with me. The chemistry was increasing and so was the sexual tension.
Despite the fact as our interaction continued so did my self-confidence because she was just that cool to be around.
Now you would think I would've been smart enough to run with it. To "do my thing" and keep it up. You would think, because it only makes sense, I'd be all her into her when we met again.
But it wasn't like that at all.
There was more people around the next time.
More guys there to flirt with her.
Suddenly, every available "stud" was taking over where I had left off and I just knew it was once again going to be a losing battle for me.
So there I was, frozen and while watching all those other guys be all into her, I got a frightening glimpse into my future:
We'd talk a little. Get to know each other better. A few weeks or maybe a month would pass and we would grow closer.
But I've been through all that before many times and what always happened was more predictable than the sunrise.
While I was "doing all the work", she was dating some other guy and kissing him on the first date. Since I was "being nice" and spent way too much time waiting for the moment to happen, and didn't know how to make it happen naturally...
I was waiting for HER to make a move on me.
Because to men, and more specifically the type two guy I used to be, that's the ultimate sign a girl is into them, when she makes the first move.
Remember that because "making a move" to some men is a lot more than just going for a kiss.
You see this seemingly innocent "passive aggressive" method is just another way to get YOU to prove how much you like us.
If we ignore you and you seek us out, our confidence goes up and we believe you're feeling it just as much as we are too.
If we keep away and act aloof or distant, it becomes an instant although pathetic test of pass or fail.
We definitely want to feel in control of our attraction and if we can stay away long enough, it gives us time to think about how to handle it and stop our attraction from pushing you away.
After all, EVERY guy understands (even though he acts differently or won't admit the truth) that every woman he chases just seems to run away quicker.
But here's the part most don't know...
We're testing our restraint more than we're testing YOU because some guys, like I was, need to feel like you're into us just as much as the guy you kissed so quickly and early on.
When we predict our future with you and we only see what some other women did to us, our anger turns passive and we want to make sure THIS TIME, it's going to be different.
This time I won't chase her because she's too hot.
This time I won't be the guy who kisses her ass "hoping" she'll like me back.
This time I will do anything and everything I know to make sure I make her prove how much she likes me.
Even if it means ignoring you and acting like I couldn't care less about you.
Thus satisfying the fragile "Ego" and it's thirst for validation.
So you met a guy who seemed into you and you even "liked" him back.
But the next time you're together it felt like you don't exist anymore.
Don't let him fool you, he just wants to know you're going to meet him half way.
Or maybe the whole way for some guys.
He is probably worried too much and is stuck, frozen, and watching for your signals, or he just doesn't understand how all this attraction thing really works.
Is he playing you on purpose?
Some do. I won't lie.
Here's where I show how you to tell if he is actually playing you or not:
"A REAL player is a guy who manipulates a woman’s feelings or emotions with the purpose of using those feelings to get what he wants from her."
Did you do something wrong to push him away?
Well obviously there's a chance that DID happen.
In cases like this and more, if you're noticing a pattern of men walking or running away from you, then you could definitely be doing things that are pushing, even scaring men away...
Here's a promotional opportunity you can watch to help you figure all that out:
Produced by Slade Shaw.
Is there a chance he doesn't even notice it's happening?
Some guys just don't pay attention to this kind of stuff as much as others.
Yet, generally speaking, you can consider it as him giving you space.
He's trying to show you he's not needy.
He doesn't want to screw it up with you.
He wants YOU to prove to him you're not going to treat him like a "dear friend" three weeks down the road.
Men are not always obvious when their attraction for you is driving them crazy.
If a guy likes you one minute and is ignoring you the next, all things considered it could just means he "really really really" likes you!
In my free ebook "Understanding Men Made Simple", I break down men into TWO types.
You can read more about both types on my home page: Why Do Guys.
You'll find both types respond and act in different ways based on their character and type.
This means the response or action you're seeing can mean two totally different things so knowing his type, can make all the difference in the world to you, and to him too.
Why Men Do Go Silent & Ignore You Too!
You can sign up below for free and learn all about the two types below or you can pick up my book, "Why Men Go Silent, Ignore You, Refuse or Won’t Share Their Feelings" and skip right to the chapter on why men MUST pull away from you which reveals:
- Why men will ALWAYS need space - Now you will know why and how you can give him what he needs to want to get closer to you.
- Why men withdraw after intimacy. You'll know what he's thinking which will make it easier for you to keep the feelings strong and moving forward.
- Why men pull back after getting close and what you must do to not push him further away.
- Why he pushes you away even if he says he loves you and how it's all a part of his process he MUST go through.
- Why a man backs off at the best and worst times and how it connected to you.
- Why he retreats when you know without a doubt he likes you and how it has everything to do with him and not you. Knowing this little "secret" can help you make it easy for him to never leave.
- Why he ignores you - Is he doing it on purpose? Is he doing it to hurt you? Why would ANY man ignore you when you've been so close.
- Why he stops contacting you - Is it you or is it him? Learn every reason why he just suddenly disappeared one day AND you'll finally know if you should wait for him or just erase him from your life.
- Why he doesn't call as much as he used to - When a man slowly back away - you'll know why he seems to slowly be removing himself from your life.
- Why his texting habits get less frequent over time and if it means he's losing interest, pulling away, or dropping you entirely.