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Why Do Guys…?

Why Do Guys Stare at Girls?

in Stare and Approach
Guys stare at girls all the time. This one is checking you out.

We don’t hide it very well, do we? Although some of us claim to be masters at not getting caught.

I guess the word is out. Girls know we’re staring at them. There’s no reason to hide it anymore.

If they want to know why, let’s tell them…

But first … This question is vague yet the chosen words – “Guys & Girls” leads me to believe this is a younger woman’s question so I’ll keep the answer as relevant as possible.

When I was “staring at girls” I was checking them out.

Beauty, especially in the eyes of a sexually driven guy, not only catches our eye but can literally freeze us. Sometime it’s almost impossible to turn away.

It’s strange because unless we talk to you the image disappears quickly. Making any later fantasies with your image almost impossible. Although I imagine some guys are better at that than other.

So if we know you and are still staring there’s a good chance we’re going to use that image later. Now before you go thinking it’s all sexual. It’s not. Sometimes it’s a girlfriend theme or the perfect “meet up” or even just a kiss.

You can safely assume, like nine times out of ten, if any guy is staring at you he is checking you out.

He wants to meet you. He is attracted to you.

In a weird way he even wants to get caught because just maybe, if you catch him staring at you, you’ll stare back and it’s on. I would say more than half of those guys are desperately hoping you’ll approach them.

From there he’ll probably even assume you like him or at least are attracted to him. That usually depends on his self-esteem.

Think of this. As guys. When we’re hanging out and some girl starts staring at us our friends are likely to smack us and say, “Dude! That girl is totally checking you out.”

Since we’re men and can only think like a male we’re usually going to assume you work the same way. It often goes like this:

  • Checking you out – We see something we like or are attracted to you.
  • Staring at you – Locked in your beauty and most like want to get caught so you’ll approach us. Lessening the chance of being rejected.

Now as for the whole “sexual attraction” level I would have to say it’s almost like an addiction. Not usually harmful but it certainly can be.

When we see a “hot” girl we’re likely to get a little excited. Not hard just sexually aware.

And it feels good.

So we do it a lot because it feels good.

Strange to you maybe but to me, as a guy, it feels perfectly natural and I’ve been enjoying it for many years. Just now as I get older I’ve learned not to let it take me away or make me do stupid stuff.

If you’re dealing with younger guys staring at you, then he may not have learned his own personal control over how good it feels and he reacts blatantly to it.

Peter White - Why Do Guy...?

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187 comments… add one

  • Mercedes Torres

    A guy at work has been staring at me and I don’t know what it means. He is really mean to me. He is always snobby and rude. Why is he mean to me yet stares at me?

    • Peter White

      I would read this post Mercedes.


      And then consider these…

      First – Mmaybe he is just snobby and rude. :) I wouldn’t take it personal.

      Second – He could think you’re snobby and rude. Lots of guys act that way around attractive women. If he staring that much, chances are he finds you attractive.

      Third – He just might be attracted to you but feels he doesn’t have a chance. He’s put you on a pedestal and assuring himself he can never have you. He might use the reason, “Since I can’t have her” to justify his rudeness or to self-sabotage his ability to attract you.

      All are valid reasons and I do hope one of them fits your situation and clears up your confusion.

      All the best and thanks for asking,


  • Wendy

    A guy in chem. lab and Chm class has been staring at me since the first lab class. When I look back at him, he keeps looking at me and does not turn away. It is almost creepy lol. It is never happened to me before. I started to like him and meet his eyes everytime he looked at me but I would turn away coz I’m shy. Eventually we kind of became friends and he even told me to sit with him in Chem class. He plays around with me a lot. Like: He calls me blind, or writes on my notebook when i am concentrating in class, or suddenly comes by my seat in Chm lab and closes my book, and much more childish things. I have also noticed he gets mad and tries to hear when I am talking to other guys and looks at my phone when I txt during class with my guy friends. He reads my txt messages from his seat(right next to me) creepy but cute at the same time; however, it is the end of the semester and he has not texted me to ask me how my day was. If we have ever txted, it was about school related things and it s been mostly me asking him questions about class. Does he like me?. I’ve noticed he has some money problems and works a lotttttt… Barely has time for anything. ­čś× please help… Should I get my friend to ask him if he likes me? The uncertainty is killing me…

    • Peter White

      No, you should NOT get your friend to ask him if he likes you. He LIKES you!

      There, I said it. No more uncertainty. :)

      Change the dynamics of your texting to him. No more school stuff unless it’s absolutely necessary.

      The way he acts with you in class is how you should start texting him. Keep in mind not all guys are good with their phones and who knows, maybe his plan is restricting him.


  • Secret dreamer

    There’s this guy whom I really like, then one afternoon, my friend told me that he’s actually looking at me intently. And even when I first saw him, he would take a glimpse at my side. I don’t know what is it all about. Since I don’t think he knows me. We barely have seen each other.

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