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Why Do Guys…?

Why Do Guys Stare at Girls?

in Stare and Approach
Guys stare at girls all the time. This one is checking you out.

We don’t hide it very well, do we? Although some of us claim to be masters at not getting caught.

I guess the word is out. Girls know we’re staring at them. There’s no reason to hide it anymore.

If they want to know why, let’s tell them…

But first … This question is vague yet the chosen words – “Guys & Girls” leads me to believe this is a younger woman’s question so I’ll keep the answer as relevant as possible.

When I was “staring at girls” I was checking them out.

Beauty, especially in the eyes of a sexually driven guy, not only catches our eye but can literally freeze us. Sometime it’s almost impossible to turn away.

It’s strange because unless we talk to you the image disappears quickly. Making any later fantasies with your image almost impossible. Although I imagine some guys are better at that than other.

So if we know you and are still staring there’s a good chance we’re going to use that image later. Now before you go thinking it’s all sexual. It’s not. Sometimes it’s a girlfriend theme or the perfect “meet up” or even just a kiss.

You can safely assume, like nine times out of ten, if any guy is staring at you he is checking you out.

He wants to meet you. He is attracted to you.

In a weird way he even wants to get caught because just maybe, if you catch him staring at you, you’ll stare back and it’s on. I would say more than half of those guys are desperately hoping you’ll approach them.

From there he’ll probably even assume you like him or at least are attracted to him. That usually depends on his self-esteem.

Think of this. As guys. When we’re hanging out and some girl starts staring at us our friends are likely to smack us and say, “Dude! That girl is totally checking you out.”

Since we’re men and can only think like a male we’re usually going to assume you work the same way. It often goes like this:

  • Checking you out – We see something we like or are attracted to you.
  • Staring at you – Locked in your beauty and most like want to get caught so you’ll approach us. Lessening the chance of being rejected.

Now as for the whole “sexual attraction” level I would have to say it’s almost like an addiction. Not usually harmful but it certainly can be.

When we see a “hot” girl we’re likely to get a little excited. Not hard just sexually aware.

And it feels good.

So we do it a lot because it feels good.

Strange to you maybe but to me, as a guy, it feels perfectly natural and I’ve been enjoying it for many years. Just now as I get older I’ve learned not to let it take me away or make me do stupid stuff.

If you’re dealing with younger guys staring at you, then he may not have learned his own personal control over how good it feels and he reacts blatantly to it.

Peter White - Why Do Guy...?

Peter White. Thanks for stopping by and listening to a male’s point view. You can stay in touch by – *receiving my newsletter, *friending my Facebook page here. – Here is where a teach men about you *DiaLteG – and this where I get to talk about meeting and approaching the opposite sex – *The Approach.

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166 comments… add one

  • Laura

    Hi Pete!

    I was sitting outside at a party with a group of friends (both guys and girls) and I said to my female friend, “OMG it’s really cold! I wish I had a jacket!” And one of the really cute guys was smiling and he said, “Oh, I have a jacket…does someone want my jacket?” And I looked at him with a sly smile on my face and I asked him, “Are you offering your jacket?” And he was like, “Yeah, here, you can have it.” And he passed it to me and I was like, “Wait…are you sure? You’re not cold?” And he’s like, “Nah, I’m okay.”

    Why did he offer me his jacket? Was it just him being polite and chivalrous, or was it flirty? Thanks!


    • Peter White

      Hi Laura,

      Well obviously he was being nice :) And I suppose a little Chivalrous.

      I’m assuming you want to know if his gesture was a sign that this cute guy might be interested in you. Right?

      In my experience, you have to look outside the situation. Look into his character as a person. Is he a person who would give away his jacket to just anyone. Once you know that you can then look at how he treats you. If it’s followed by flirting and uses the jacket as an excuse to talk to you more, then you have your answer.

      That’s key. If he now uses the jacket as an excuse to talk to you, or used it to get to know you better, then he most likely is interested.

      Not all guys flirt or know how BUT I can say, giving someone your jacket is not a flirty thing to do. Flirting is a sub-textual thing and more than often includes words. But it was a nice thing to do and might be used as a lead in to something else.

      I think you’ll know your answer soon enough Laura,


  • sarah

    hi, i like this guy thats in 8th grade and the only class i have with him is PE. which means we run, and when i run my face gets red. when we were done running we are supposed to go to the gym in are school so i did. i looked up and saw him staring at me. Was he staring at me because he likes me or because my face was red?

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